Eve’s Parcel Review by Joanne – April 2019

The joke goes that they should put prizes in tampon boxes. Like “Congratulations! You’re on your blob! Here’s a voucher for a weekend away, to be used when shark week ends!” OK, so it’s not a weekend away but Eve’s Parcel is very much of a similar vein! Thank you so much to Sonia for sending me Eve’s April box to review. I love the ethos of Eve’s Parcel and as a feminist I’m totally on board with anything that celebrates women! I won’t go so far as to tell you to love your period, for that would be hypocritical of me, but Eve’s Parcel certainly goes a long way to easing the pains of That Bloody Time of the Month. I am also on a small mission of my own to demystify menstruation, which hopefully came across in my unboxing. True to form, I shall be as honest and open in this, my written review!

You can see my unboxing of this super parcel here:

You have a cornucopia of options to choose from, which is brilliant because our periods are personal to us and no two women will have the same period. You can choose between towel only, tampon only or a mix of both. If you’re an eco-warrior you can choose eco-friendly towels and tampons, which in retrospect I now wish I had done. The month by month subscriptions cost £12.99 but there is the option to prepay for three months at an upfront cost of £38. Eve also offers a Pamper Box for £10 per month on a month by month basis, or £30 prepaid for three months. Just for you, we have the code of EVES15 which gets you (you guessed it) 15% off your first order!

I plumped for the mixture of sanitary towels and tampons. I am terrified of leakage (hello menstruation stigma) so I use both towels and tampons, particularly in those initial heavy days. I sometimes think about trying a menstrual cup, but then I talk myself out of it. I don’t have the patience for fiddly things so I could see myself having a fight with my lady parts and I’d rather avoid that. Tampons aren’t without their own problems. Have you ever sneezed while wearing a tampon? It’s like a bullet from a gun. Or shaking a bottle of tomato sauce.

Another good thing about Eve’s Parcel is that every package includes three night towels and three panty liners. The only wee quibble I have is that for me personally, I would appreciate a greater number of night towels because I use a nappy towel every night I’m on my blob. I don’t like ruining my sheets, although having said that, periods do help you learn how to remove blood from objects, which is probably why you hear of more men getting done for murder than women.*

There’s a choice of three delivery dates so you can choose the date that’s most suitable for you. Sonia must have been psychic because when I unboxed I wasn’t due on until the following week. My blob had other thoughts however (as it often does) and decided to make a guest star appearance a few days early.  

The packaging is super discreet, consisting of a plain plastic wrapper over the box. I was very enamoured by the design of the box itself, particularly the monochrome stripes. This made the box look classy and elegant and shows that period stuff doesn’t need to be pink and red and girly! We see enough of red when we’re on the rag! I was really curious to see what was in store for me.

Of course, it isn’t just fanny pads and tampons in Eve’s Parcel! Here comes the equivalent of that free holiday I dreamed about in my intro! Every month your Eve’s Parcel will contain five self-care goodies to work on every symptom of that most bloody time of the month! I personally hate being on the blob. I’m emotional, cranky, grumpy and physically unwell. I always wonder what are those mythical creatures in sanitary product adverts, you know the kind, girls all happy and breezy and carefree? That is most definitely not me! I hate being on the blob! Having your period sucks, physically, mentally and emotionally. Personally I can’t wait for the menopause to hit! I never used to be plagued with PMT until relatively recently so, in conjunction with my mental health problems, I can turn into a bit of an emotional wreck. My emotions are on CAPITAL LETTERS. I’m also much more troubled with physical symptoms, particularly migraines. There’s a reason that the American sign language for menstruation is curling your fingers in towards your palm and tapping your face. Yes ladies, you got that right, you’re essentially punching yourself in the face. Eve’s Parcel seemed like it would be a balm to my poor uterus. It was truly lovely to have some treats to ease the period pains!

As I opened the box I was first met with the literature. I particularly loved the affirmation and have stuck it to my fridge so that I see it every day. Every month’s box contains a different affirmation, and also a yoga pose of the month. I’m not a yoga practitioner but if you are I’d imagine you’d love this! The sanitary products were wrapped up as two separate wee presents. I loved this little touch as it made what is a necessary evil appear so much more exciting! The little bags can be popped into your cupboard or drawers to preserve your mystique. I don’t hide my products though, and I’ve recently progressed to carrying my tampons and towels to the loo at work instead of lugging my gigantic bag with me. I’m sure there’s much more exciting things to smuggle than a tampon!

The magic of Eve’s Parcel for me is the quality and variety of the pampering products together with receiving your monthly essentials. This month’s box contained:

  • Bellapierre Cosmetics Banana Setting Powder (full size, RRP £20)
  • Health & Heather Organic Blackcurrant Tea (single sachet)
  • Nomad Beauty HelloSkin Water-Splash Mask (full size, RRP £3.50)
  • Soap Smith Marble Arch Butter Bath Bomb (full size, RRP £4)
  • Traybakes Dark Chocolate Brownie (full size, RRP £1.65)
  • Seacret Mud Soap (full size, RRP £5)

Now don’t argue with me, not even if you’re PMT-d. I will take no prisoners. This box is great value for money and contains a great range of products!

I fired into the sanitary products first (you may notice there are some products missing from the photographs as I had to raid my Parcel due to my aforesaid unpredictable blob!). Here’s a nice picture of the fanny pads.

The second thing I used was the Soap Smith bath bomb. This bomb was pretty as a picture and smelt just as good as it looked. I’m a bit contrary in that I don’t really like having a bath when I’m on my period because I don’t like lying in bloody water like there’s been a massacre, and whenever I put a tampon in it just soaks up all the water and I’m left lying in a little puddle. Thanks to my period I had a stinking migraine so I thought I’d see if a hot bath with this little beauty would ease my poor head. My migraine didn’t go away unfortunately but I did come out of the bath feeling slightly more human. I really liked this bath bomb, it’s as good as any bomb you would get in a bespoke bath sub box.

The Banana Setting Powder is something I’ve been swithering over trying for some time so I was chuffed to find it in the box. I love my make-up but I freely admit to being somewhat uncertain as to what banana powder actually did. The contents list told me that it’s a colour correcting setting powder, with subtle yellow hues to counteract any redness or discolouration. A light dusting was enough to set my make up although as I don’t get bothered by skin discolouration I didn’t really notice any colour correcting effect. I really liked this though and I’ll use it on an alternating basis with my usual translucent powder or selfie powder.

What I loved most about Eve’s Parcel was that it did indeed have a product for every symptom of your period. It’s a cliché, but it’s true for me: when I’m on my period I inhale chocolate and all sorts of junk. I’m a fan of a cake even when my hormones aren’t going haywirel, so I wanted to love the Traybakes brownie. From my experience of similar products though, I feared it would be dry as dust and not a spot on a proper homemade brownie. Talk about irrational thoughts! The inside was gooey and melty and tasted just like a proper home-made brownie. I scranned this without pausing for breath. This was delicious! I’ll be on the lookout for these wee beauties in the supermarket now!

The Seacret soap and Nomad face mask was also a hit! The packaging of the face mask definitely made it stand out from all the other facemasks on the market and it was pretty easy to get the mask to stick to the shape of my coupon! My skin felt amazing after this mask.

As another period ended without any major bloodshed (other than mine), emotional trauma and Scott still alive, I reflected on my Eve’s Parcel experience. I can say with hand on heart that it definitely makes your period something to anticipate with… well, the word ‘joy’ is a bit strong, let’s say ‘with less trepidation’. The contents of the box are amazingly good value and a great variety, and it’s brilliant getting your sanitary products included. I would definitely subscribe to Eve’s Parcel, but I would do my bit to help end period poverty by donating what I would have spent on products to a local charity. Maybe that’s something Eve’s Parcel could think about doing, providing a way for us ladies to give a little bit back and support our women-in-arms.

*Not really. That was a joke.

** Providing of course that you don’t want kids.

Joanne x

https://www.evesparcel.com

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